I am a 30yr old woman. My husband and I will have been married for 2 yrs in April. My sex drive, which used to be insatiable before we got married, has now about fizzled out it seems. I’ve heard advertisements on the radio for this condition and wondered what the symptoms are and how they go about determining if you have this, and how they treat it. We have 2 kids and very busy schedules. I’m wondering if this is a medical problem I’m suffering with. I love my husband with all of my heart and sex has always been an integral part of our relationship and it bothers me that I am not interested in making love anymore.
Related posts:
August 24th, 2009 at 1:44 pm
I’m glad to hear that you’re not embarassed about this situation. Many women are afraid to come forward and admit that they have no sexual desire or that it has decreased over time. I applaud you for being honest and willing to discuss the problem.
Although I am not a medical doctor, I can offer you some information about female sexual arousal disorder. Much of what you mentioned (i.e. kids, married for 2+ years, etc.) may be the cause of why your desire has decreased. For many women, having children is a main cause. The body goes through so much during pregnancy and even post-partum that women have a hard time adjusting back to what it was like pre-baby. This does not include any new physical adjustments (i.e. waking up to feed the baby, calming a crying baby, the general responsiblity of another human being) that may place stress on you. Even if the baby has been a joyous event in your life, stress is always stress whether it is distress or eustress.
Lack of sex drive is related to two broad issues: physiology and psychology. If it is a physical problem, it is mainly related to a hormone problem and/or problems becoming stimulated (i.e. painful sex due to lack of lubrication). The psychological problem focuses mainly on items like stress, body image, intimacy, etc. You may want to ask yourself a couple of questions regarding each category before making any ultimate decision. If you feel comfortable, you can also visit your doctor, OB/GYN or primary, and ask for your hormone levels to be checked during your annual visit to rule out many physical ailments. During the exam, your doctor will also ask if you take any prescription medication; some medication decreases the sex drive, especially anti-depressants that are classified as SSRIs. If no physical or hormonal problem exists, your doctor may refer you to a psychologist or therapist to discuss the issue further.
I hope this has been of help. The one thing to remember is that you are not alone. If you are interested in researching this more, you can check websites such as http://www.sexualhealth.com or even Google the phrase female sexual dysfunction or female sexual arousal disorder. Best wishes.
August 24th, 2009 at 1:44 pm
sex toys maybe
August 24th, 2009 at 1:44 pm
Never heard of such a thing but would suspect an under lying medical reason. Good time to take a trip to the doc for evaluation!
Might be medical or phsycological!
August 24th, 2009 at 1:44 pm
I don’t know about FSAD, but I do know about GOTKIDS. When you’ve both got kids, jobs, and housework to do, sex just becomes such a hassle. You’ve got to find time, a place, privacy, energy, etc. etc. Sadly, it’s a little bit of reality that sex slows down when kids take over. Your sex drive is there in your early 20s to get those kids there, and it drops in your early 30s to make sure that you take care of the kids you made in your 20s.
I wouldn’t really worry about it, it’ll be something that comes and goes unless you really want to pour all your energy into it. If you really feel like something is medically wrong, you can see a doctor (or psychologist), but I seriously doubt you have any afflictions. It’s perfectly natural, why bend yourself out of shape about it? Give a little extra time here and there to puff peter to make your husband happy and let it go.
August 24th, 2009 at 1:44 pm
Yeah you are infected with the LIFE virus.
It affects most women in their 30’s.
August 24th, 2009 at 1:44 pm
read these.